Our final days with the motorbikes

17 to 20 April 2017

Hanoi
We planned on making it to Hanoi today but when we got up there was torrential rain. Outside our window the rock wall around the garden had been breached and water was just pouring in from the flooded fields. We debated sitting tight but eventually decided to put on the stylish rain gears and go for it. [M- There was a truly absurd amount of water falling out of the sky. I was wearing my bit Vietnamese poncho that covers the whole bike, and I would have to bail out the litre or so of water that collected in a low point in it every few minutes, while dodging the aforementioned gravel piles that were being washed into the road. At least it wasn't cold -M]

Although they have a wet and dry season in Vietnam there doesn’t seem to be any drains on the road for these weather events. All over the road there was grit and rocks that had been washed down from the hills onto the road surface. At one point Mark drove over a puddle which turned out to be a large pot hole that he seemed to half disappear into. The shock was so violent his wing mirrors were flung out of position, everything that wasn't previously saturated was then, and he discovered a few days later that he had put a dent in the front wheel rim.

As we were nearing Hanoi the rain finally cleared up, and we had our first and only interaction with the Police of the whole trip. The officer stood in the middle of the road so we had no choice but to pull over. [M- we had previously read other people's advice and discussed this, and agreed that the best strategy, contrary to all NZ instincts, was to drive past without stopping. Unfortunately we couldn't have done that without literally hitting the guy -M] He pointed to a sign that showed two cars and indicated that they were not allowed to overtake. He then pulled out a book, all written in Vietnamese with 2,000,000 VND underlined ($100USD). We pulled suitably surprised faces. He then had a bit of paper with 1,000,000 VND handwritten on it and he started pointing to that. They wanted drivers licences and our motorbikes blue cards. Thankfully the NZ licences have a picture of a motorbike on them when you have your motorbike licence this removed one possible source of complaint for them.  For a while Mark tried arguing that the sign showed cars not being allowed to overtake but that motorbikes were fine to overtake. This didn't get anywhere and they continued pointing to the "fine" we needed to pay - immediately, on the side of the road, to them, in cash.... Eventually Mark suggested that I type into translate "please write me a ticket and I will pay it at the police station". Bingo! The first officer read this and straight away had a "dammit they're on to me" face. I showed the translation to the two other officers and they all realised they weren't going to be getting any cash from us - we were handed back our documents and waved on our way.

[M- I was pleased and proud that I was able to get through the whole trip without doing anything to contribute to the endemic corruption in the countries we visited. I later learned though that the cops would have been within their rights to confiscate our ownership papers and hang on to them until we did pay a (actual) fine in person, a process that would have taken several days and completely ruined our plans for selling the bikes, causing us much more damage than what we could have negotiated the bribe down to.  So I'm glad they were corrupt and lazy enough not to call our bluff, because that could have been a very expensive principle otherwise. I'm also not 100% sure to what degree I was actually taking a principled stand for law and order here versus just trying to save some cash while acting self-righteous about it. -M]

I had been quietly confident that my seven weeks of motorbike riding in Vietnam would mean I was prepared for driving in Hanoi. I was wrong. It was all of the scary parts of driving in Saigon amplified.

The main goal while we were in Hanoi was to sell the bikes. We knew we had the backup option of being able to sell them to a local mechanic. The downside being they screw you down on the price, give the bike the once over lightly then add $150+US to the price before selling them to another backpacker. We preferred to sell them to other backpackers. We spent a bit of time wandering around trying to find a central backpacker area where we could set up and accost any foreigner that walked past with our sales pitch. Our first afternoon we sat outside a café with our handmade signs. It was a bit demoralising. There was no interest. Mark did take on the role of wise old motorbike mechanic and give advice about what to look for on a bike to some German girls who were trying to decide what type of bike to buy, but that was about it.

We also discovered that parking in Hanoi is outrageously bad, even for motorbikes. There is just no room. Roadside space is at a premium and the ladies selling their street food get a bit pissed off if you encroach on “their” space. If you can find somewhere to sneak it during the day that is fine. But after 6pm the roadsides have to be cleared. Locals seem to bring their bikes inside into the entrance / dining / living area of their home. For the rest there are designated patches of paid parking on the side of streets. There appeared to be some complex rules around this parking that we could not grasp. We spent an hour driving around in the dark (Mark’s blue LED’s came in handy for making sure I was following the right bike) pulling up to parking spots only to be yelled at in Vietnamese and shooed away. Finally we cracked the code and were allowed to park.

Mark's bike in all its LED glory

Our second day of selling the bikes and I was making noises about selling to the mechanics. We relocated and parked our bikes outside the new hostel we were staying at. There was much more foot traffic but still no interest. Late in the day an Austrian / Swiss couple wandered past. They were wanting bikes and were planning to ride in Vietnam and Cambodia. After much chatting about our trip and the strengths and weaknesses of the bikes they were keen to test ride them. It was weird seeing someone else get onto my bike and ride it away. After they had taken both bikes for a ride they were giving “we’re interested but we want to think on it overnight” signals. Then miracle of miracles the German girls from yesterday wandered over – they would like to test ride the bikes too. Could there be a bidding war?

The German girls returned from their test ride and there was a flurry of conversation between the others in German – reading between the lines we think it was hey we were here first, they’re ours and please don’t force the price up for us by offering more. [M -God I wish I could have understood, there was some serious discussion going on -M] The German Austrian couple handed over the initial cash deposit to seal the deal and we finalised handing over all the paperwork the next morning.

Now that the bikes were off our hands we were free to tourist in Hanoi. I dragged Mark along to the women’s museum which covered women’s involvement in a number of areas of Vietnamese life – family, weddings, the American war. Unfortunately there was no air conditioning and it was really really hot so the museum didn’t go down so well. Mark fell asleep. [M- we both fell asleep. It was the most boring pile of rubbish you could imagine. No, I don't need to see the special wedding headdresses for all 30 of Vietnam's ethnic groups. The concept sounded good, but wow, that place could be used as punishment. -M]

We then went to the water puppets show. It’s one of those things you do when you are in Hanoi that is not necessarily amazing but was an enjoyable way to spend 45 minutes. There are a bunch of puppets controlled by hidden puppeteers with the stage being a pond. The puppets are pretty amateur looking and there is traditional music being played by a fairly disinterested looking band. There were about 15 little pieces which seemed to revolve around a fisherman fishing and not able to catch any fish – instead catching his fisherman friend with the net, or ducks being chased by the fox. There were also dragons with sparklers in their mouths! We ended our time in Vietnam this evening having dinner with the couple that bought our bikes. [M -Eating quite possible the best pizza I've ever had, which wasn't what I expected in Vietnam -M] Hopefully they stay in one piece.